Swine Flu III

LUKE
(After a pause.)
Look, I’m sorry about the name-
HALEY
Forget it.
LUKE
No, I’m a jerk.
HALEY
…Go on.
LUKE
That’s all I had, really.
HALEY
Oh.
LUKE
I mean, I could explain myself but we have, what, another week on these couches.
HALEY
Good thinking. You might just make it worse.
LUKE
I guess I deserve that.
HALEY
You deserve a lot more than that.
LUKE
Fine.
HALEY
But in the interest of being quarantined together…
LUKE
Hey, this was your idea.
HALEY
Uh huh.
LUKE
(Notices that she’s been cleaning.)
You don’t have to clean up.
HALEY
I know.
LUKE
You’re sweet.
HALEY
How are you feeling?
LUKE
(Sitting up.)
Better.
HALEY
Good.
LUKE
Not better enough to play Yahtzee, but, you know…
(HALEY throws a pillow playfully at him.)
You’re probably not feeling great right now either. You should lie down.
HALEY
No, I’m fine.
LUKE
Well, I doubt you’re fine.
HALEY
I mean, other than the…flu.
LUKE
Seriously, just relax.
HALEY
(Sitting.)
It hits everyone differently, the doctor said.
LUKE
You said you have a fever?
HALEY
It might’ve gone down. I took some Tylenol. Anyway, it’s in the very beginning stages, you know?
LUKE
Yeah. You just got diagnosed…
HALEY
Yesterday.
LUKE
Oh.
(Beat.)
It’ll be nice not to be alone in here anymore.
HALEY
I know. Crazy timing.
LUKE
I’m surprised you even remembered Tony.
HALEY
He was at the party.
LUKE
I know you met him. Did he, uh, remember your name?
HALEY
I’m not sure. I opened with, “I’m Haley, that girl who made out with your brother at the party.”
LUKE
He thought it was pretty funny. Just, because I don’t usually…
HALEY
Yeah, I know.
LUKE
Where’d you see him?
HALEY
At Chipotle.
LUKE
Ah. He loves it there.
HALEY
Me too. Lunch and dinner, at least for me, I don’t know…
LUKE
Oh yeah. But wasn’t it your roommate who ran into him?
HALEY
What? Oh, yeah. Yesterday. I saw him…last week sometime.
LUKE
Okay.
HALEY
Yeah, sorry, that was confusing.
LUKE
No no, just a little.
HALEY
I’m probably not thinking straight.
LUKE
I did really like you.
HALEY
What?
LUKE
At the party.
HALEY
I thought we weren’t talking about that.
LUKE
Yeah, I just thought I could do something to get out of this hole.
HALEY
Oh, okay.
LUKE
I thought you were interesting. Honestly. I mean, we did talk for a while.
HALEY
But you didn’t ask my name.
LUKE
There was never really an opportune moment, if you recall.
HALEY
So that’s it?
LUKE
And I was a little embarrassed.
HALEY
Because we…
LUKE
No. I mean, a little. Anyway.
HALEY
Why?
LUKE
It’s not important.
(Breath.)
I just didn’t know who you were.
HALEY
You mean, my name.
LUKE
Well, obviously.
HALEY
You really didn’t know we worked together?
LUKE
Ah, no.
HALEY
Because, I mean, you didn’t even introduce yourself. You talked like you knew me. That’s why it wasn’t so weird when you-
LUKE
Yeah, I thought I did.
(Beat.)
I told you, I don’t do that kind of thing with strangers.
HALEY
So you…Why’d you think I was from Indiana?
LUKE
I was just asking.
HALEY
I don’t believe this.
LUKE
Don’t believe what?
HALEY
You thought I was someone else.
LUKE
You just looked familiar!
HALEY
That’s why you said…It all makes sense.
LUKE
No, stop it. It doesn’t matter who I thought you were.
HALEY
Are you serious?
LUKE
The fact is, you were interesting. You. I was talking to you, I mean, we were sitting together for an hour before anything. I honestly thought you were great, you were just so refreshing. And, yeah, I thought you were a girl named Theresa from my sixth grade class, but she was the hottest girl in the sixth grade, so really it’s kind of a…
HALEY
Are your going to finish that sentence?
LUKE
No, I’m not. My point is, you were there and you hate Dave Matthews and you read Sedaris. And we made fun of the fauxhawk guy for ten minutes. And you’re beautiful and funny and smart and, as it turned out, a great kisser. And how was I supposed to ask your name after that?
HALEY
If I was so great wouldn’t it be worth finding it out.
LUKE
I just figured, you know, I’m damned if I do, I’m damned if I don’t. That situation.
HALEY
What?
LUKE
It was too late, die cast, bridge burned. I just figured I’d screwed things up enough already but at least I could save you from…I don’t know.
HALEY
I wouldn’t have minded. Well, I guess I would mind at first. But I really liked you too.
LUKE
I have a way of convincing girls that’s not a good idea.
HALEY
Yeah, you seem to be trying pretty hard at it right now.
LUKE
No, I just-
HALEY
Yeah. I know. But stop.
(Suddenly struck by dizziness.)
Oh, wow. Dizzy all of a sudden.
LUKE
(Rises.)
Are you alright?
(Hands her the bowl.)
HALEY
(Setting the bowl down.)
I’m fine.
LUKE
(Sitting next to her.)
Dizzy spells. It’s on the list.
HALEY
Yeah, well…
LUKE
(Feeling her forehead.)
You don’t feel warm.
HALEY
I told you…Tylenol.
LUKE
You’re not feeling nauseated.
HALEY
No.
LUKE
Light headed.
HALEY
Just for a second there.
LUKE
You don’t really seem to have any symptoms.
HALEY
Maybe not like yours.
LUKE
Are you achy?
HALEY
Yes. That’s what tipped me off.
LUKE
Because you look fine.
HALEY
Really?
LUKE
You just don’t look sick.
HALEY
I swear.
LUKE
I’m not saying you’re not. Just wondering.
HALEY
It’s coming. These things just take longer for me.
LUKE
Yeah?
HALEY
Yeah. And, I mean, how bad can it be? You don’t look so bad.
LUKE
I look like death on a stick right now.
HALEY
Oh, come on.
LUKE
Yeah, I guess we’ll just see. I mean, we’ve got a whole week together.
HALEY
Yeah.
LUKE
I just hope you don’t get sick of me.
(HALEY suddenly kisses LUKE. He recoils at first, then relaxes into it for a moment. Gently, he pulls away.)